Books Tagged With what - emotion - survivor guilt

Word Count: Click here to reveal41861 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealBisexual, Demisexual, Gay (Click here to hide)

Summary: Alone in Japan, Finni is struggling against the constant distrust, avoidance, and xenophobia he experiences every day. He misses home. He misses his family. Nightmares come all too frequently because of the stress, and well, Christmas is just not Christmas in Japan. Not how he understands it. Distressed by how miserable Finni is, his roommate, Mamoru, offers to be Finni's family for Christmas. Little does he know how much one agreement would change everything between them, because both of them kept secrets neither ever dreamed were true. 2015 Rainbow Awards, Honorable Mention & Finalist - Best Gay Fantasy

Word Count: Click here to reveal30000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: Massachusetts State Trooper Ross Huber is giving one last sweep of the roads before heading in for the night.  The nor’easter hitting the Boston area is worse than expected by an order of magnitude, and the governor has just issued a travel ban.  He finds a wrecked car half buried in a snowbank and rescues its human and canine occupants from carbon monoxide poisoning, but is forced to take shelter with them in a vacant or abandoned house when the roads are blocked. When he gets the victims indoors, he thinks the human looks uncomfortably familiar… Ash Machado has been through a lot in his career as a war correspondent.  Sidelined by an injury, he’s returned to Boston to take up a job as a news anchor.  After he loses control of his car on an icy road, he wakes up in an unfamiliar home, looking into the face of the guy who broke his heart in college. Neither Ross nor Ash are the same guys they were in college, but they’re trapped in the abandoned house with no place to go.  Can they get past old hurts long enough to get through the storm, or will the same misunderstandings that drove them apart years ago make this confinement unbearable?

Word Count: Click here to reveal40000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: Spells & Stardust is Scott's first anthology - eight sci fi and fantasy shorts that run the gamut from regeneration to redemption. The Bear at the Bar: A gay fish out of water tale with a pinch of magic. Tight: What happens when your lover disappears in midair? Morgan: The year when everything changed. Re-Life: What if you were reborn in a strange new future? A New Year: They met every eleven years. And each time, Hank's life changed. Repetition: What if you wanted to go back in the closet? Gargoyle: Sometimes you get what you deserve. Sometimes it happens on All Hallows Eve. Avalon: A few bright moments in the sun, stolen from outside time. Most of these stories have been previously published in various anthologies and journals. This is the first time they have all been collected in one place.

Word Count: Click here to reveal68000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: A life in hock. Seven years ago, Logan Conner and his legend tripper college roommate stumbled into the middle of a ghost war. Logan escaped. Trent did not. Guilt has driven Logan to hunt for answers ever since—not only for why Trent was trapped, but how to return and save him. On the verge of abandoning the search as hopeless, Logan discovers the solution at last thanks to folklorist Riley Morrel, the man he never expected to fall in love with, and the man he’d do anything to keep safe, including leaving him behind. A life on hold. When Logan disappeared in a puff of motorcycle exhaust, Riley’s life took a nosedive. After dropping out of school, he’s not entirely sure it’s not still diving. Sure, he has a job—one that’d send his thesis advisor screaming. Still, there are perks to his gig as the researcher for paranormal investigation show Haunted to the Max: He’s in the ideal position to propose projects for the team to tackle. Like their latest episode in Portland, for instance, where Logan just happens to be bartending. If nothing else, confronting the big jerk will give Riley some closure. A life’s last hour. But as the two men take tentative steps toward each other again, they begin to realize that their relationship, the shoot, and Logan’s quest to free Trent are hopelessly entangled with one tragic day at the riverside, over a century and a half in the past. And when the smoke finally clears? Not everyone will walk away.   Stumptown Spirits is a second-chance, opposites-attract, supernatural suspense romance featuring a TV show one step past jumping the shark, a narcissistic TV personality, a craven ex-ghost, annoying bosses, interfering (but well-meaning) friends, personal redemption, and, of course, an HEA. Note: This book was previously published. It has been lightly revised and re-edited, but the story remains the same.

Word Count: Information not available

Character Identities: Click here to revealBisexual, Polyamorous (Click here to hide)

Summary: Months have passed since Mystere left England in search of Joyeuse, leaving Douglas and Margaret behind, safe in behind ancient shields in a manor house in Sussex. Then Douglas is called away for an emergency, and disappears without a trace. A letter arrives, assuring Margaret that Douglas will be safe. A letter from Caedda, one embedded with spells meant to kill. Fearing for her husband, Margaret risks her own life and that of her child in a desperate attempt to summon Mystere, setting into motion a journey that will take them from Sussex to Aachen to the mountains of Austria, and to the long-hidden sword, Joyeuse. With all four swords once more in the world, the secrets they’ve been hiding will finally be revealed.

Word Count: Click here to reveal98000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: A werewolf pack reels from the loss of five members, including the Alpha and Beta, at the teeth and claws of Canadian werewolves. Summoned by a frantic call from a young werewolf who survived the massacre, Anax Tobias Rogan, the highest-ranked wolf in the United States, heads to North Dakota. Tobias is able to stabilize the pack, but his trip takes a toll on his relationship with his mate, Kyle Slidell. When the Canadian Anax, Silas Creighton, requests a meeting, Tobias seizes the opportunity for a trip with Kyle to restore their connection. With an international conflict to resolve and a traumatized young werewolf in tow, Tobias and Kyle struggle to find time for each other. And then assassins try to take Tobias’s life… This book includes discussions of past sexual assault and physical child abuse, homophobia including a French Canadian homophobic slur, a child character living with cancer, and depictions of grief and mourning.

Word Count: Click here to reveal115000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: When life drowns you in lemons, to hell with making lemonade. I wanted to burn the whole world. But eighteen months from the day my life was torn apart, I’m tired of the anger. Tired of the nightmares. Tired of putting one foot in front of the other just trying to survive. Three months on a high country sheep station in the middle of nowhere is exactly the reboot I need. A chance to break free. To breathe again. To find a way forward. I put my entire life on hold and head south to Mackenzie Country. But falling for the captivating young station boss was never part of the plan. Holden Miller might be smart and sexy and push all my dusty buttons, but we come from two different worlds. I’m not looking for a relationship. I’m not interested in love. I’m done with all that. But Holden doesn’t care about my rules. Nestled safely in the arms of the spectacular Southern Alps, on an isolated sheep farm at the top of the world, Holden begins knitting my battered heart together one careful stitch at a time. And with every pass of the thread, every braid of the river on our doorstep, I catch a tantalising glimpse of something I’d almost given up on. Happiness, and maybe even love. If I have the courage to reach out and grab them.

Word Count: Information not available

Character Identities: Click here to revealBisexual, Pansexual, Polyamorous (Click here to hide)

Summary: Cursed with immortality, John Zebedee has resigned himself to spending the rest of eternity alone. Then he discovers an escaped captive in his barn — the immortal heir to the Elven throne. Ethriel captures John’s heart, and gives him hope for the first time in a very long time. But Ethriel’s captors are hunting for him, and the rest of eternity may be closer than it seems.

Word Count: Click here to reveal299900 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealBisexual, Genderfluid, Genderqueer, Intersex, Non Binary, Pansexual, Polyamorous (Click here to hide)

Summary: **2016 Rainbow Award Winning Poly Romance Series** My secret could save my people. It will also destroy my life. My name is Carivel. I was born female, but I've been living as a boy for years in my adoptive village of Draebard, doing a job the elders insist can only be done by a male. Getting too close to anyone risks revealing my birth sex, and if I am discovered, I'll become a pariah--facing exile, or worse. The last thing I ever needed was to fall in love with two unattainable men. The last thing I ever expected was for both of them to love me back. It's not just me, though. The men I love have secrets, too. Senovo, a eunuch priest, has been hiding his shape-shifting curse, convinced that the wolf inside him is a cold-blooded killer he can't control. By contrast, Andoc is a fierce warrior and a favorite of the village chieftain. But if his history of male lovers--including Senovo--came to light, that could all change very quickly. Now, the three of us are embroiled in a desperate bid to unite the ragtag tribes on the island of Eburos against an invasion by the powerful Alyrion Empire. One by one, our secrets are coming out. And it's not merely our own lives at stake--far from it. If the negotiations fall apart, it might just mean the end of everything. * * * The award-winning Complete Horse Mistress Collection by USA Today bestselling author R. A. Steffan is an explicitly steamy paranormal ménage romance with a twist, perfect for open-minded MMF/reverse harem fans. If you love noble, damaged protagonists overcoming near-impossible odds to find lasting love and happiness (not to mention smoking hot, tender sex), this series is for you.

Word Count: Click here to reveal80000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealBisexual, Gay (Click here to hide)

Summary: Two kingdoms. Two princes. One secret to break them, or to bind them. When a rowboat washes up on the riverbank, Prince Malires puts his kingdom’s security first. The dead man lying in the boat can’t answer many questions, but the seriously injured survivor might be able to give Malires some details about what happened in the hostile kingdom to the north. If, that is, the young man ever wakes up. Malires knows who the survivor is: Prince Aleric, youngest son of the King of Gerelen. He’s the most renowned warrior that Gerelen has ever known, and Malires has barely survived their previous encounters. Only his need to understand why Gerelen suddenly stopped communicating with the outside world keeps him from taking advantage of the situation and taking out this threat to his kingdom. It has nothing to do with the sudden discovery of how beautiful Aleric is. Unfortunately for Malires, when Aleric does awaken he has no memory of who he is or even of his own kingdom. The court physicians insist that Aleric’s memories must return naturally, or else they might be lost forever. While both men recognize the urgent need for answers, they cannot fight their attraction for one another. Aleric comes to feel just as defensive of Malires’ kingdom as he once did of his own. When the truth comes out, will love conquer all, or will misunderstanding and pride drive Aleric to a desperate undertaking?

Word Count: Click here to reveal74800 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealBisexual, Genderfluid, Genderqueer, Intersex, Non Binary, Pansexual, Polyamorous (Click here to hide)

Summary: **Book Three of the 2016 Rainbow Award Winning Series** Carivel, Andoc, and Senovo have refused to let circumstances tear them away from each other. Draebard’s tribal chieftain does not approve of Andoc’s decision to continue with the unconventional relationship, and now, on top of everything else, war is looming after the combined forces of Draebard and Meren destroyed the Alyrion Empire’s military outpost in northern Eburos. Senovo and Carivel have long relied on Andoc to be their rock. Their touchstone. But when Andoc's future is shattered by betrayal and life-changing injury, it will fall to both of them to give the big-hearted warrior a new reason to live. Perfect for open-minded fans of ménage and reverse harem romance, The Horse Mistress: Book 3 explores themes of loss and desperate hope against seemingly insurmountable odds.

Word Count: Click here to reveal276413 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: Seven unforgettable men: Gristle… Tough and hard to swallow, he’s an embittered former soldier who has absolutely buried his own humanity Wynn… A young Welsh pony trainer with a wicked sense of humor and an abiding love for a much older man Tristus… The Man of Sorrow, Gristle’s first love and a would-be acolyte of the man who will one day become a saint Xan… A scatter-foot who follows only his thirst for the open road and his lust for desirable men Dub… A scholar-warrior with a shrouded past who stands at the right hand of Ireland’s High King Fergus… That same king’s bad-boy son—a drunk and a miscreant with designs on his father’s wise man, and on that man’s own attractive brother Oisean… An innocent wilding trying to survive in a different new world, one of hidden evil and not-so-hidden desire Seven unusual men meet and interact in one way or another during a dozen or so years of turbulent adventure in the badass time of St. Patrick. One critic has described the novels as “gay sexual journeys that are powerful—and absolutely breathtaking.” The novels may be read as stand-alones. But the men’s stories are linked in a way that brings passion to higher and higher levels. As you read, I think you will want to experience the entire series as a crescendo of grief and joy and self-discovery.

Word Count: Click here to reveal25000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: Russell Pine goes to the café every morning to enjoy his  time chatting with Sam Tesh, the café  owner, a friend made over the past twenty years. So when Sam asks a favor, Russ reluctantly agrees to play in a chess tournament. But the contest isn’t the real challenge: Russ finds himself the focus of a secret courtship in words and pictures left for him to discover each morning, leading him to the question: In a café full of young and beautiful minds, who is looking at the graying chessmaster? The first edition of this novella was published in June 2013 as part of Make a Play, the Daily Dose anthology at Dreamspinner Press. This is the expanded second edition.

Word Count: Information not available

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: When the right space pilot walks into his bar, a desperate bartender uses all his wiles (and tentacles) to talk the man into business and his bed--but the spacer is still enslaved by his past and isn't sure he can deal with a two-armed lover, much less one with six. As the supply shipments stop coming, Teo Houdin needs all his tentacles to keep his waystation bar open. Facing a riot by thirsty miners stranded in the backwater of the galaxy, Teo helps a greenie space pilot buy a ship in return for a regular haul of liquor. But he longs for the courage to invite the enigmatic spacer to fill his lonely bed as well. Still smarting from his newly implanted navigational ports, Jimenez knows owning his own ship will prevent him from ever being bought and sold again. For a former slave, transporting cargo through the emptiness of space sounds like paradise, but after meeting the compassionate and sexy Teo, his heart feels empty, too. At the edge of the galaxy's spiral arm, can Teo convince Jimenez that the heart has its own tentacles and theirs should be entwined forever?

Word Count: Click here to reveal3600 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealLesbian (Click here to hide)

Summary: Run. Don’t stop. And don’t look down. Stranded in a human-ruled land that has no mercy for an elf, Vala has two goals: protect her baby girl and follow her wife to a place where there is no fear of slavery. But will this new world allow her to slip through their grip?

Word Count: Click here to reveal54000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealBisexual, Gay (Click here to hide)

Summary: A young magic user who wants desperately to live. A jaded recluse who has forgotten what living means. They’re each other’s only chance. Toby’s wild magic is killing him. The mage guilds have given up on him, and it’s only a matter of time before he dies in a spectacular, catastrophic bang. His only hope is an exiled wizard who lives in seclusion—and is rumored to have lost his mind. The years alone on his hilltop estate have not been good for Darius Valstad. After the magical accident that disfigured him and nearly drowned Pittsburgh, he drifts through his days, a wraith trapped in memories and depression. Until a stricken young man collapses on his driveway, one who claims Darius is his last chance. For the first time in fifteen years, Darius must make a choice—leave this wild mage to his fate or take him in and try to teach him, which may kill them both. The old Darius, brash and commanding, wouldn’t have hesitated. Darius the exile isn’t sure he can find the energy to try.

Word Count: Information not available

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: In a world where magic is real and evil walks amongst humanity, a young sorcerer is beset upon by enemies, both old and new. Angelus Salvatore is the only necromancer in all of Boston, and his name is whispered warily by the undead and fellow sorcerers alike. He and his brother Isaac are the lone survivors of an attack by an army of the undead, in which Angel used a spell so powerful it forever marked his place in history. Now, years later, Angel struggles to balance his career as a teacher of the higher magical arts, his role as big brother, and a tenuous relationship with an Elder vampire from the local clan. When his brother's boyfriend is used as a pawn in a mysterious plot to draw Angel out, Angel is once again drawn back into the old hostilities that fueled the Blood Wars and led to his family's death. Leaning on others for help is something Angel cannot do, and while he searches for clues into who may be targeting him and his brother, Angel finds his heart steadily growing occupied with Simeon, Elder and vampire. Dealing with death magic and vampires on a daily basis may leave Angel jaded when it comes to life and staying that way, but the more time he spends fending off the ancient vampire's attention and affections, the more he realizes he wants to give in. Can Angel find out who wants him dead, and keep his heart safe in the process? How can he fall for a vampire, when his whole family was torn apart by an army of the undead? Death stalks the streets of Boston's historic Beacon Hill....and there is no one more suited to battle against death than a necromancer. MATURE CONTENT Contains graphic violence, male/male sexual contact, a cranky necromancer, a sexy Irish vampire, and a pesky demon.

Word Count: Click here to reveal85000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: Every action has consequences. For a decade, Angel Salvatore has been the most powerful sorcerer and only necromancer in all the Northeast. Never one to ask permission nor apologies, he has acted with near impunity for years. Until now. The High Council of Sorcery has come to Boston, and Angel is their target. Charged with numerous violations of practitioner laws, his freedom and family are placed in jeopardy. If found guilty, Angel's apprentice Daniel will be imprisoned to serve out the remaining years of his apprenticeship. Isaac, his brother, is too vulnerable to be left unguarded, and Angel fears for his sanity and health. And Simeon, Elder vampire and Angel's mate refuses to see Angel convicted under the laws of the Council and his actions to keep Angel free threaten to start a war that could destroy their world. And Angel faces the severest of punishments—the castration of his gifts. The Council has never cared for the people of Boston, and Angel doubts their motives. They have come for some insidious reason, and it has nothing to do with upholding the law and everything to do with Angel. Dealing with an impending trial, a wayward ghost, and a graverobbing ring of thieves leaves Angel on the edge. He thinks he may have a handle on things until violence erupts across the city, and a stranger comes to town...a stranger with his own dark powers of necromancy. This is book 3 of a series, and the previous books should be read first for full enjoyment. Trigger Warnings are on the Copyright Page and can be seen using the Look Inside feature or by downloading a sample of this book. 85,000 words 340 pages Gay Urban Fantasy Romance

Word Count: Click here to reveal46000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealGay (Click here to hide)

Summary: Ario six-four-nine-one is an obsolete synth gigolo—especially when his latest trick proves to be his last in a brutal and horrifying way. But he's only a synth, it's not like he can really think and feel. No one will notice one more out of date synth tossed in the garbage. Except for Elias, homeless and lonely because he's not what his father—or the world—wants him to be, haunted by a tragedy for which he cannot forgive himself. When he finds a battered, broken, long-discontinued synth in a dumpster, he decides to repair the poor thing despite all the reasons he shouldn't. Then all those reasons come crashing down, and in order to save each other from a world that doesn't want either of them, Elias and Ario will have to sacrifice everything they hold dear: freedom, safety, and even themselves. Warning: contains graphic depictions of violence and sexual violence.

Word Count: Click here to reveal115000 (Click here to hide)

Character Identities: Click here to revealBisexual, Gay, Straight, Transgender (Click here to hide)

Summary: A group of strangers meets at Ragazzi, an Italian restaurant, for a cooking lesson that will change them all. They quickly become intertwined in each other's lives, and a bit of magic touches each of them. Meet Dave, the consultant who lost his partner; Matteo and Diego, the couple who run the restaurant; recently-widowed Carmelina; Marcos, a web designer getting too old for hook-ups; Ben, a trans author writing the Great American Novel; teenager Marissa, kicked out for being bi; and Sam and Brad, a May-September couple who would never have gotten together without a little magic of their own. Everyone in the River City has a secret, and sooner or later secrets always come out.