Draco Archaeologist 1

It looks like at some point soon I’m going to have to take the reins firmly in hand and get things underway.  After all, a man can’t wait forever, but I know that I still would always wait for him.

I have been expecting for what seems like forever for him to make his decisive move, but I’m finally thinking that I just might need to supply the long awaited sexy push myself to get things underway.

I was volunteered yesterday to go with Venetia to keep tabs on her after the last insane fiasco that could have resulted in some unwanted incarceration time, and a whole lot of unquestionable racket on her part.

I’m a degreed archaeologist as Dr. Mael Corentin, Earth Witch status aside, so Venetia tends to take my judgement in these kinds of matters seriously, and again my parents adore her for it, trusting her to keep an eye on me as well and keep them firmly in the loop.

She will undeniably cooperate with me while just dismissing her son’s comments as irrelevant on various subjects.  She is constantly trying to be a matchmaker between us, snide remarks aside and all, but on that encouraging note I’m all for it.

I have loved him since the day I met him.

The last time Venetia got off on a wild hair tangent I was sent out to see what was going on first, since Daxi was about to throw a tantrum while seriously freaking out.  I was to make sure she was first, still alive and second, to see if there was anything authentic to her arcane and expensive explorations and to do it now.

Well, she was certainly still alive alright, hunkered down in a luxury RV in the mountains near Tucson Arizona.  She was totally convinced that she was on the trail of the Holy Grail of all things, in Arizona no less, and up on the mountain top.

Repeatedly I’ve told Daxi, that being my special name for him in case you wondered, is that she spends far too much time watching lost treasure shows on TV, not to mention all the online crackpot Internet sites she subscribes to and does it way too often.

I tried my best to persuade Daxi that it was his mother acting out her infatuation with Harrison Ford and that Tucson would be the last likely place for a major historical object of that magnitude, but no dice.

I was on the hook to go after her and no arguments accepted, so shut up and go.

She was worrying that particular rumor like a dog with a juicy bone and wasn’t about to let it go.

She had seen some show alluding to the object making its way to the Americas ages ago.  Venetia was now convinced that in the early years Tucson had been part of the Silk Road via the Santa Fe trail no less, but at least it was worth points for being creative.

From that point on there was no stopping her, period, that is until the park rangers were about to show up for the expedition.  Daxi had enlisted my help so he wouldn’t strangle her on the spot and cause another unwarranted mess.

“You get your sweet ass in your SUV Mael, and bring her back pronto,” he ordered me without mercy.

He did, however, have a grin for my predicament the bitch.

He unfortunately completely understood that she would never remotely listen to him, and for him to go after her would be a lost cause.  I must admit I know he is right, so rather than argue any more, I went after her.

I of course asked him what he was going to give me for the rescue operation hoping against hope that he would finally speak up and do the right thing by me.

However, instead of a simple kiss from him that I was dying to receive for so long, and my first, I only got a damn knowing Daxi smirk on his wonderful face, and a cryptic “you’ll see,” he answered, then winked at me.

Keeping in mind that I’m as open to suggestions as the next witch, I’m more than ready to listen to a story to check it out, if necessary.  I would want to find out if there is even the most remote hint of credibility to it.

Luckily for everyone, however, I got to Tucson in time as she was just about to have her hired crew head up to Mount Lemmon and start digging furiously in the prime tourist area of course.

That sort of activity would have certainly been frowned down upon by the local authorities without a doubt.  I’m positive that it would provoke the aforementioned incarceration and for certain, unwanted questions.

Just to keep things even more interesting if that is necessary, Venetia is a psychic medium of some renown, in other words, quite famous in her own right along with my sweet slow on the uptake Daxi.

She is the real cookie actually and extremely effective when she is focused, but of course, not during the ever changing and ever present cocktail hour to be honest here.

She can be extremely efficient but has the attention span of a baby gnat and often goes spinning off topic and constantly driving Daxi nuts.

Instead of conversing with the living first, to find out all the facts before she begins, she tends to get quite personal and chatty with the dead that is never a promising idea in the first place.

Unfortunately, she usually stirs up a whole lot more trouble for the nervous living while she’s at it, especially when the occasional and previously unknown affair or two rears its ugly head.

She is, nevertheless, very entertaining as I mentioned, quite young looking for her unstated years, and strikingly beautiful for a much older woman, but that’s a supernatural for you so all bets are off on her real age.

She is, I have to admit, a lot of fun to be around, if you can ignore the constant disconnected nonsense.

However, don’t ever get on her bad side or watch out as all humor tends to go right out the window in a flash and her incredible focus takes over.

I, however, have never observed anyone that she managed to contact, who was willing to talk about the latest spring fashion colors or to give their honest opinion, and to freely give their judgement without a ruckus for bothering them.

Most would just give her a few vulgar words and tell her to buzz off and quit disturbing them.

And as I mentioned before, she loves her evening cocktails as I do myself, but this, however, translates to it is always evening somewhere, and she has forever been an international kind of gal.

So okay now, back to the present.  This time she’s been in contact with her estranged and quite recently late brother-in-law Paul’s attorney, who not long ago informed her of Paul’s unexpected and abrupt passing.

She quickly referred him to her son Daxon, Paul’s blood related nephew, to deal with the boring attorney, and his deadly boring details as she put it, complaining that he simply would not get to the bottom line.

It seems there was a family falling out that happened several decades ago when his first wife Liza, now also dead, unfortunately decided to tell Venetia precisely what she thought of her.  It was, unfortunately for Liza, after Venetia had a few strong belts to calm her nerves from her ever-present flask at her husband’s, Daxi’s late father’s quite formal funeral from what I understand.

Even though it was never a clever idea in the best of times, Venetia had certainly not cared all that much for Paul in the first place.  She always said she was put off with his constantly failing rediculous money schemes, and the inevitable shenanigans that surrounded them.

Then again, she put up with him to keep the family peace with her late husband Randall, who it seemed adored his younger brother, and just could not get enough of him unfortunately.  Paul in turn adored his nephew Daxi, no surprise there, while the feeling was quite mutual between them even if a bit strained due to his wife Liza the bitch, and now our second wife to contend with; Portia.

But since Liza’s ill-advised dissertation took place at Randall’s funeral it seemed appropriate at the time, to cut the old and tenuous familial ties and get on with Venetia’s new single life.

She was from that point on minus her extremely wealthy dead husband, his utterly flaky if not entertaining brother, and of course his first slut wife for that matter.

Her son Daxon remained in occasional but regular contact with his dad’s scattered relatives out of a sense of obligation to his late father.

Daxi always kept Venetia informed about what the former in-laws were up to but only if it was interesting.  She always thought of most of them as a total waste of time and were forever hitting up her late successful husband for a handout.

When the sooner rather than later time finally came, Venetia even offered to bury the hatchet and attend Liza’s rather modest funeral out of respect for her late husband’s memory, again a stretch from what I gather.

But nonetheless, Paul had intervened and sent a polite thanks but no thanks message through Daxi.  He said that although gracious and thoughtful of her and thank you very much, it was not a great idea on Venetia’s part, no, not at all.

Paul had wanted to make sure the deceiving bitch stayed dead and quiet, but more importantly quiet as in never hear from her again.

It seems he figured that considering the supernatural nature of Venetia’s family, he made it clear to her son, that he never wanted to hear from his nagging, cheating, dead wife ever again and in any way, especially if it opened the gate for a continuous haunting.

So then it seems that Paul, immediately on the heels of the first wife’s funeral, remarried a real piece of work.  Now his second wife, our Portia, seems to have inherited half his estate if you have the nerve to call it that.

And from what I understand from Daxi, Liza had nothing on Portia in the aggressive roaring bitch category.

Since Venetia has never met the woman, she was all for giving her the benefit of the doubt, now that they had been thrown together as mutual property owners.  Venetia was more than willing to put a new foot forward so to speak and try to be civil at the very least.

However, I’d, certainly place my money on that foot going right up Portia’s ass, heels, and all.

From what I gather, Portia is apparently forty-four or so years old, quite sturdy to put it nicely.  She has inherited half ownership in a supposedly somewhat run down, off the beaten path, dude ranch type place north of Sedona.

It is on the way to Flagstaff and is somehow still hanging on, probably due to the location near the famous destination, and after a quick perusal, I noticed there is no online presence to be found, and very odd for an overnight kind of place.

Daxi did mention one strange thing about his conversation with the attorney, and it stuck in my mind.  It seems that the private portion of the Will, pertaining to Venetia, clearly stipulated that her inheritance balanced on notifying the attorney once she had viewed the co-owned property with Portia, and with proof of that event.

After she had made it clear that she had seen the property, Daxi was to call him at once, with the proof I mentioned but the venue not specified, and then he would confirm her to inherit the property.

She would then go ahead to fucking step two, whatever the hell that was from this strange setup, and here I was stuck in the thick of it.

The things you do for love.

A peculiar request indeed, but Venetia took it in her stride and just said that I of course would take her picture in front of the dude ranch naturally.  She also said preferably with a dude and mentioned sadly that it was probably only another one of Paul’s too many unexpected aberrations.

In other words it is a dump.

It was also rumored to be haunted by some incredibly ancient animal spirits of some sort that no one is clear on.  There was something very secretive about it, and to some extent no one was willing to talk about it, and that for sure perked Venetia right up.

From what Daxi told me, Venetia was tossing around the idea of buying Portia out and sending her promptly on her way, then creating a luxury haunted destination type of accommodation if the setting afforded it.

But that will remain to be seen in the next few hours when we went to meet Portia and give the place a good looking over.

I had been told several times over that Paul, it seems, had no financial sense during his later life.  However, from what I gather from the stories I’ve heard, he never did from the start.  So other than about the five thousand dollars in a bank account that Portia inherited, the other half of the supposedly run-down dude ranch was all Portia had for her twenty years’ time with her now dead husband.

Daxi also mentioned that Paul stated in the Will, that the small amount of cash was being more than generous to an obnoxious, cheating, lying bitch like Portia.  He apparently knew how to pick the prime bitches it seems, and his regrets evidently ran nasty and deep.

Portia had always somehow been under the somewhat mistaken impression that he had a source of hidden wealth, and had commented viciously to the attorney about it, but with nothing to back her suspicions up.  Rumor has it that he always told her she was his ‘little treasure’ just like the source of his questionable wealth.

So here I am heading out of Phoenix, now pulling off on the Carefree highway exit to pick up Venetia on the way for the discovery trip up north.

Daxi informed me prior to my departure that she wanted to enjoy a light breakfast with her friends before the trip.  She told him that I could pick her up after she finished, with emphasis on the word after.

Paul, it seems wasn’t the only one who had a taste for bitches, but for the most part I loved Daxi’s mom in spite of her quirky diversions and being rude without really meaning to; she had that nailed when she truly wanted to be rude.

That way, she claimed to Daxi, we would have time for a nice fun little chat and catch up on all the relevant dirt before we went to meet Portia, forcing us to become somewhat serious again.

He also told me that I could expense the place I was staying at with Venetia in Sedona, since it was her idea to stay there overnight.  Portia made it exceedingly clear to Daxi when he spoke to her to set up this impromptu meeting, that there were no available cabins for either of us at the ranch period.

The only two rooms that were not supposedly booked for rent, were reserved on a semi-permanent basis and had been set aside for years in advance, making me wonder if it was a booming enterprise or what, but we would soon find out.

I lucked out on the accommodations for a change, as Venetia does not stay at less than five star accommodations period with no wiggle room in sight.  I’m sure Daxi was awfully familiar with that aspect of his mother.

She frankly said that she would not be caught dead in a place like had been described to her by Daxi, after his odd chat with the questionable attorney and Portia, her words not mine, since I was not involved at that point.

As I drove up, I saw my glamourous target standing in front of the crowded establishment, tapping her foot in her impossibly high heels.

I jumped out of my SUV to preserve my manners in front of my potential and impatient mother in law.

“So there you are Mael dear, and how are you this lovely morning?  I’m so looking forward to discovering what might be in store for us up there.  I am currently hoping for the best, but you know optimistic me.  I’m always ready for come what may.  Are you aware that this somewhat famous little breakfast place here doesn’t have a liquor license of all things?  I mean c’mon, are we out in the desert somewhere?  Oh hell yes, of course we are in general as you are aware, but you know what I mean.  I was shocked as you must know about me, as I do like a civilized breakfast in the morning along with little bracer to get the day started properly,” she told me.

I loaded both her and her luggage in the SUV, then jumped in and headed for the freeway going north.

I pressed the accelerator just a tad bit deeper.

“I wouldn’t happen to know that about this particular restaurant Venetia, I’ve never been there, nor have I been invited to breakfast it would seem,” I remarked, bitchy start to the morning due to my empty stomach, I know.

She stopped looking in her little gold mirror long enough to glance over at me sort of getting the point as much as she would care to, I would guess.

She then had the decency to look a bit flustered as no one generally questions Venetia or her motives, at least not to her face without repercussions.

“Why, I should have asked you to come in to breakfast with us!  How thoughtless of me to forget, and you know I do apologize.  However you would have been bored since Peggy was there in full form, and being the polite person I am, I was forced to listen to her monotone drivel.  You know how she can be, but maybe you don’t come to think of it.  She was having a fit this morning, as her husband number four, you know or perhaps you haven’t heard, but I did tell Daxon.  However, who the hell knows what he happens to share with you in your private moments?  I would never in my life dare to ask.  But getting on with the story here, her husband about climbs the walls when she is there alone with him.  I heard through another friend of hers that they originally got together since her oral skills were top notch.  He was in love, and I don’t mean about her conversation skills as I’m sure you realized by now.  So getting on with it however, he apparently out of the blue booked himself a long cruise a few days ago.  She had told him, several times in fact, and when they first met, that she didn’t like boat rides of any type, hence his trip alone, at least alone on the surface it would seem.  Well, the clever man saw his golden opportunity and literally took off while the getting was good!  I mean plainly used the escape hatch, on her dime of course.  But only after this morning’s conversation with her, I got the serious impression he was about to find himself going off the tit quite soon so to speak.  I seriously don’t think he’s going to last much longer with her good oral skills or not.  It made me stop to ponder just who else is on that love boat?  But then again, who can blame him?  She talks non-stop without breathing, and he finally bought her a puppy to talk to.  Now that formerly sweet and gentle dog bites!” she told me laughing.

See what I mean?  Annoying but entertaining however, I did have to cringe at the sex talk.

I was ready to offer up a prayer to the Fates for not including Daxi and myself in that part of the conversation, since I know it would not be at all beyond her to do so, not even for a second if it crossed her mind.

“That’s really too bad for her if she’s getting broadsided with that kind of crap, talking too much or not.  The few times I’ve casually met her, I thought she was a nice friendly lady, a little intense at times, and a bit too open about personal things maybe, but we all certainly have our various faults.  However, you now make me wonder if she talks in bed?” I replied thinking aloud and was instantly mortified by what I’d said.

I was now going a bit faster as Venetia glared at me about the same time that I realized what I had just said, then she burst out laughing, and happily, we giggled on and off all the rest of the way up to Sedona and our anticipated meeting.

I do however generally have my conversation limits with Daxi’s mom that I strictly adhere to without diversion.

After we arrived in Sedona, Venetia directed me around the hordes of tourists carrying their icy glutton sized sugar drinks while stuffing their faces with humongous numbers of useless carbs.

It would seem that now the famous Red Rock monuments have a serious competitor for attention with the junk food industry in this town.

Once across the bridge leaving town going north, we pulled in and stopped at a gorgeous resort.  We were at once surrounded by pretty people attempting to assist us with anything for a tip, well perhaps not anything for this was a reputable place after all.

We each had our own small cottage on the beautiful grounds with the wonderful Oak Creek cheerfully bubbling away nearby while the water was heading back toward the nearby town.

“I’m sure that Daxon has filled you in as he tends to do, even if only to get a chance to talk to you, Mael.  You clearly understand that by now don’t you, Mael?  I mean I seriously hope you get my meaning here Mael as my son is crazy in love with you.  He has eyes for only you to the exclusion of everyone else for all the years and years since he first laid eyes on you.  I know for a fact that I certainly didn’t raise a celibate so sticking my neck out here, he needs a little push!  However, you may not be quite so aware of that aspect as I would suspect or maybe you are just the consummate actor after all, hmm?  I might be speaking out of turn here as I usually do, but it is what it is, so bear with me as I know you will my sweet dear boy.  Now before we make our first venture to the questionable property, how about some slightly late lunch and a nice smart cocktail to get us in the mood to suffer the bitch?  Lunch will be on Daxon of course, and he can certainly afford it as you well know thanks to his late daddy.  So what do you have to say about having a drink with a helpless, frail, little old lady?” she asked with a tempting smile, especially tempting as by now considering I was starving.

“Sounds good to me Venetia, but only one cocktail for now, as we need to be on top of things here to see what we are dealing with when we get there.  I know from what Daxi mentioned before I left, that Portia was just a shade away from being completely rude to him.  So we need to be prepared for it, and ready to deal with anything that may happen,” I told her firmly.

I was knowing just how distorted a one cocktail lunch could become with my sweet Venetia.

I sure didn’t want this recent last topic of conversation to be part of the lunchtime banter while going into private details if she was drinking.

Soon we were sitting at a Creekside table, off to ourselves, and I was enjoying a crisp glass of Chablis while Venetia was loving her, what she calls a nasty dirty martini, with a big pair, giant pimento stuffed olives that is.

We had given our orders to the server, and while Venetia had opted for a light Shrimp and Yellow Tomato salad, I’d chosen the veggie burger and some delectable spicy Yukon Gold fries.

I must admit if even only to myself, that this was turning out to be a wonderful experience, rough start aside, and I was enjoying myself with her as I always do, but still missing my oblivious Daxi.

After Venetia’s leading comment about Daxi talking to me, and then how he did it only to be with me, I was now wishing that he’d come along with us.  Maybe there will be some obscure way I could somehow convince him to drive up and meet us up here after our pending meeting.

I’d have to work on that angle, as to be honest with myself the feelings according to Venetia, were certainly more than mutual if not realized just yet.

I too liked talking to him myself and was beginning to understand just how much, but that sure wasn’t going to be a topic for Venetia at this stage of the game.

Now that it seems to be coming out in the open, I wonder what took us so damn long as I’ve loved him for as long as I’ve known him and there has never been anyone else for me even as a casual date.

And Venetia was on to me, damnit and we all know where that would go and probably sooner than later.

“Okay so enough daydreaming here for the moment.  I agree we need to have a plan of action to corral that bitch.  Cutting right to the chase, I’d like to propose a friendly and cordial front at least at first.  If Portia decides to be less than friendly, well then, we just let her know she’s on precarious ground and wasn’t about to be in charge around here.  My personal attorney would dispatch her in a second and eat her five thousand inheritance for lunch.  Once we have gathered all our pertinent information, we dump the bitch back where she came from, no more questions asked.  I know that Daxon has already mentioned using our real snake of an attorney upfront to cut to the chase, but I’d like to hope for the sake of dear Paul’s memory, that our Portia will see things as they are and be somewhat reasonable.  Otherwise I’m afraid we will be forced to administer the coup de grâce, I’m certain.  And just for a little more icing on the proverbial cake my dear, if she opens her fucking trap and becomes rude to me, I’ll just call up her loving husband to see what the hell he has to say in this dicey matter.  I’m sure he won’t be pleased after having to drop dead to get away from that insidious piece of work,” she snickered deliciously, and I loved it.

I know she is relishing every second of this, but then again so am I, so I’m not playing the part with this.

“I have to agree with you about keeping things to a low roar until we are forced to do otherwise and perform a bit of a bitch correction to keep things on target.  Obviously, I’ve never met Paul while he was still alive.  I have no real desire to meet him now that he is dead, with the help of your talents of course.  However, it is good that we do have a choice here, that is just in case we need to persuade her to play nice the hard way.  As we both are completely aware, Daxi is an extremely personable man, and for him to call Aunt Portia a bitch right out of the gate, we may be in for it from the get-go.  We may have our work cut out for us upfront, so I’m grateful to you for having a plan from the start,” I explained.

While I was making nice with the compliments, she snuck a delicious French Fry off my plate, dipping it into the spicy homemade mayo Chipotle sauce.

“I’d prefer to keep that an alternative as well, as I take no pleasure in an irate Paul that I haven’t seen in longer than I can remember.  While he was still in life, we did have a pleasant enough relationship, nothing to write home about you do understand, but we did get along for the most part.  His first wife Liza was the culprit in that family tiff that set us apart.  It was better for everyone that they went off in their own direction, following our nasty little spat with her trying to get Paul to pilfer our credit account while on vacation in Hawaii.  I have no idea if you know about what happened back then, do you?” she asked.

She was arching her perfect eyebrow at me, giving me no choice but to tell her the truth and take my knocks.

“Nothing more than there was a dispute of sorts as we talked about.  Daxi mentioned to me that at their wedding, Paul’s first one, that all hell broke loose with cops and all, but after the ceremony of course,” I told her honestly.

“Well that is sure being polite, but then again, that’s Daxon for you, my sweet kind little boy.  We had originally met Liza, his first unsavory wife, while we were on vacation.  We had taken a nearly broke Paul on a long cruise to Hawaii with us.  As I’ve mentioned, and I of course don’t mean to not be discrete,” she began, furtively and quickly stealing another fry.

“Never, I would never think that of you Venetia!” I replied, earning an Oscar for not even grinning even a little bit.

Of course she gave me the suspicious eye, but I could see that her fingers were just itching to grab another crisp golden fry.

“Alright, so here we were on the lovely cruise paid for of course by my late husband Randall and he was never up for anything but first class.  I’ve mentioned before that Paul had difficulty with money, especially tragic considering he and Randall began with the same seed funds supplied by their grandfather in a trust.  This money was meant to last for their lifetimes, and beyond or at least that was the plan.  I guess fortunately for him, Paul ended up with the most in the looks department, but I digress even though it is a crucial part of this sordid story you must understand.  Randall invested and nurtured his fortune, while working his ass off to become an extraordinarily successful stockbroker.  Paul on the other hand was the handsome and popular party boy while literally and pointedly squandering it on high living.  This is what he called good times, that is until he started collecting less than favorable wives and the money promptly ran out.”

“I believe I can see where this is going already,” I said, this time slapping her hand away from my diminishing yet coveted delicious fries.

“Yes.  It was only because their grandfather had the sense for the trust to become available in measured portions governed by age that Paul was even able to keep going as much as he did.  So as I said, even though Paul did have his many faults, he was close to Randall, and they enjoyed each other’s company immensely, all other things aside.  Paul simply looked wonderful and without a doubt gave the impression of having the wealth he was squandering.  So to move along with this, we were having a cocktail or two on the observation deck as we approached the islands, while having an enjoyable conversation about our plans for the next few weeks.  I then happened to notice that Paul wasn’t staying with the conversation any longer.  I then of course, followed his line of sight, and in walks quite a beautiful woman, giving credit where credit is due as I do, and Paul’s mouth almost fell open.”